"I will always be Leo's mother": the first victim of vicarious violence in Catalonia speaks

 

Leo was two years old when his father murdered him, in the summer of 2021 in a hotel in Barcelona, ​​with the aim of hurting his mother, from whom he was separating

Two years later, Leo's mother, the first recognized victim of vicarious violence in Catalonia, speaks for the first time with a media outlet and explains, in a 3cat " Sense ficció" documentary , how she experienced the events. Without showing her identity, because the trauma is still very great and she doesn't want anyone to recognize her on the street.

"I can introduce myself, above all, as Leo's mother. A boy who unfortunately lost his life at almost three years old. Even if I no longer have him with me, physically, I will always be Leo's mother."

He had never spoken to a media outlet. In a long interview at her lawyer's office, Leo's mother explains how she experienced that tragedy and what happened after the initial attention and the minutes of silence of public condemnation.

Leo's parents had just begun the separation process. At the end of August 2021, the child was to spend the first night alone with the father. "I was very sad, to separate. And we were in this dynamic of "we will do well for Leo"

Finally, on the night of August 23, father and son went to sleep in a hotel. He no longer lived in the family flat and she, somewhat reluctantly, accepted it. At half past ten that same night he received a call on his cell phone:

"And suddenly I saw his number, his call. He was talking very fast, very fast. A lot. And at some point he said to me: "find the best psychologist you can because what I just did you will never get over ".

He ran to the Concordia hotel in Barcelona , ​​where Leo had stayed with his father. The emergency services were already there, but they could do nothing to save the child. The father had run away. He was found 23 days later, dead in some land next to El Prat airport . He had killed himself.

"Even to this day, even though I'm aware of it, even though I rationally know perfectly well what happened, it's still hard for me to think that this person that I really loved, that I married, could have come to this end with the aim of doing me the worst possible harm."

The mother was still in shock when she had to enter a legal maze that ended up engulfing her. "I am the first case of vicarious violence in Catalonia and I don't fit into any box," he explains. And he adds: "I could never have imagined that in addition to living the worst of my life, I would have to devote so much energy to the legal and legal aspects, let alone to achieve nothing."

Her lawyer, Marta Ariste, explains that she has been denied aid as a direct victim of sexist violence in the Spanish State "because it is understood that she was not financially dependent on her murdered two-year-old son". A fact that he believes deserves a public denunciation:

"It's surreal and hard to understand and you read it and you have to read it three times to say, 'did I understand it right?' Well, yes, it has been explained and explained many times and denied again many times."

He has also been denied rent allowance, the allowance to receive free psychological care (beyond the initial care provided by Barcelona City Council) and he had to go back to work when he was less than a year old of the child's murder, because that is what the ICAM, the medical court, decided, which did not grant him work disability, the lawyer assures.

"So, to this day everything has been denied. And when you explain it to all areas, at all levels, they say 'Oh, it can't be, it can't be'. Well, yes, we are in 2023, Leo was murdered in August 2021, two years ago. And we're still like this"

For Leo's mother, it has been one blow after another, and she has felt abandoned by the institutions : "It is very hard because it is a lack of recognition. It is like a punishment, on top of another punishment, on top of another punishment" , explain.

I see it as an abandonment of the State. Even as abuse."

Right now, Leo's mother has only received help from the Generalitat de Catalunya. All those of the Spanish State continue to be denied.

His case changed protocols in Catalonia, and compensations for victims of vicarious violence have been increased and all procedures have been simplified.